But then, people of the f-list, stalkers and potential lurkeurs (what, I have an abnormally high traffic when I post something) , people-who-fall-where-by-chance, which would fall by RL friends here (... the "RL" is particularly inappropriate, and indeed, this is the kind of occasion I remember that there are only two of the f-list I've ever seen IRL, and only two others I friendées before having met IRL. Which leads me nowhere, so close the parenthesis.) :
After a series of crises, gallons of tears, dozens and dozens of hours of sleep to poor periods, a refusal to speak, communicative and social death sudden and total, the impression that everything was easier and tolerable in isolation from the world, drying intensive courses, self-pity, the angst of the existentialist crisis, a near total decline in the bedroom of the apartment, the irrational fear, attempts to questioning that lead nowhere [...], so I had The Talk with the administrative coordinator of the Institute, after having The Talk with semi-paternal (and I'll soon be cases of conscience for all these people abusing patients and understanding). The procedure begin Monday morning, but then, for many reasons egocentric individual:
Erasmus: Dropped ♥
M1: Dropped ♥
Theatre Studies: ♥ suspended
I. .. I feel like doing something totally irresponsible and good-for-me-(and-not-what-I-should-be), for once, therefore, pre consent, I'll blow a much much better. Yet no cases of conscience, no feeling of having made a mistake, the crisis of guilt should expect at the turn One of these days one of those weeks, but as stated above, it will be "for what I did" and not "for what I should think / feel" so, how mean, it might be more healthy ? Hell. It's been three years since I threatened occasionally have a crisis at school, I got it, the consequences are going, I feel exhilarated to be "free" in consciously destroying something (but voluntarily ). I should not have the right to feel also relieved ♥ * spent three hours at fifty yards from the office of the coordinator before daring to go see her yesterday, after having postponed the discussion for a week * Thank
Chozo-if-you-pass-and there, and sorry if you end up being my post-weir angst for everything concerning the problems of self-esteem and existential crises ♥
remain some mails to send here and there and a few tips to resolve, but I should return to France at the end of the month / early March to think carefully after school, de-dramatized, find of interest / curiosity in some areas, a little perspective, and, above all, find me a clue. Now, he must send tons of messages / is showing signs of life to everyone ignored for a month-and-sometimes-more-so-affinity-because-I-knew-that- going-as-melt-in-tears-and-all-tell-if-I-saw-the / o /
... and as I wished a happy new year to almost anyone and, anyway, I'm The Deadline-Breaker: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
... and as I am in Barcelona and I have sent greetings to anybody, there people who want me to send them a card good year-as-I-am -here-I have-the-right-to-celebrate-the-new-years-after-January-being-given-my-relationship-privileged -with-the-cut-off dates? ♥ For some people-dont-address-I, they will receive without being able to give their opinion, but I do not have the addresses of all the people who pass by here so I could not do without their ♥ agreement
(the combo ... "it-s it-is-done + decompression post-angst and Discussion Finalizing Nutella + music + fluff = wow. AND FOR NOW I AM TOTALLY HAPPY FOR DECISION THAT I HAVE TAKEN \\ O /)
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